Musician and Music Related Jokes - Add your favorite!

Over the years, I've heard a ton of funny jokes that center around musicians and the music business. I could put up about 20 here,but I'll let you guys do it.

Let's keep this CLEAN! Also, no slamming of particular people, like saying, "so and so is a joke." It's already been done.

Ok, here's the starter joke:

What's the definition of an optimist?

A banjo player with a pager (cell phone for the modern day version).

Tags: Humor, Jokes, Music, Musician

Promote

0 members promoted this

Replies are closed for this discussion.

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Pat McDonald on June 9, 2008 at 10:20pm

A few good ones.....

Q: How do you know your kid's gonna grow up to be a trombone player?

A: You take him to the playground and he can't swing and doesn't know how to use the slide.

Q: How many FOH house guys does it take to change a light bulb?

A: They don't do lights

Q: What's the difference between drummers and horses?

A: Horses only have to carry ONE person at a time

Thank you! I'm here all week. Try the veal.

Pat

Permalink Reply by Dave Jennette on June 9, 2008 at 10:26pm

How do you get a song writer off your front porch?

Pay for the Pizza.

Permalink Reply by Redheaded Stepchild on June 24, 2008 at 12:43pm

One of our hobbies on tour is to collect musician jokes, (mostly drummer and banjo for some reason). Here are a few that come to mind:

What's the similarity between a drummer and a philosopher? They both perceive time as an abstract concept!

How many bass players does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, the piano player can do it with his left hand!

What's the difference between a pop musician and a jazz musician? One plays 3 notes for millions of people, the other one,...well you get it right?

What's the difference between God and a soundman? God doesn't think he's a soundman!

OK, sensitive drummers avert your eyes! Did you hear about the drummer who was so dumb that other drummers started to notice?

And my personal favorite: What's the difference between a banjo and a vacuum cleaner? It's harder to get the dirtbag off the banjo!

Permalink Reply by Jed Hackett on July 1, 2008 at 12:12pm

What's the difference between a female vocalist and a terrorist?..... You can negotiate with a terrorist.

forgive me if that has already been added.

Permalink Reply by Steve Forrest on July 2, 2008 at 11:20am

Kid tells his dad: "When I grow up I wanna be a drummer."
Dad says: "Son, you know you can't do both."

My pallbearers will be all drummers......they've always carried me.
....or is it, never use a drummer for a pallbearer....they're gonna drop something after 4 steps.

Why can't a drummer pour a good beer? They always rush the fill.

(none of the bass player jokes are funny or true)